The day I dared to hope

The mother scanned the shelf for a carton of milk. There seemed so many. It had been five long years since she'd stopped to look at milk. Previously she avoided the milk aisle, little fingers couldn't help but to touch. As if the thought of the impossible seduced him, his fingers always wandered further than they should. Now his fingers wandered and she let them. She stood there as if in a trance and when she couldn't decide she went with the choice that seemed the most normal. The one she was use to seeing in the fridge on trips to grandmas. The one she carefully avoided as she stacked her sons food into the fridge.

As she lifted the carton off the shelf her son asked to carry it. It took everything she had to say yes, her brain hadn't caught up with the day's events and she wondered if it ever would. After pausing she handed him the carton and he took it, he cradled the carton in his arms, the way she'd once held him. He held his head high on the short walk to the register, the mother didn't speak. She had no words left and even if she did none were needed. He stood tall as he waited at the register. Somehow the enemy had become the treasure.

Somehow they made it.

Somehow they survived.

Life threatening food allergies don't end with food. They effect every aspect of your life. And just when you think you're got this they knock you down. You lose friends. You lose trust. People you thought would support you don't. You can't sleep at night because you're to busy worrying if your child will die when they aren't with you. The anxiety sneaks into other areas of your life, and if you're not careful it will take you down. It's taken everything I've had to survive the last 5 years. Today we won. The biggest win we've had.

Today my son took on cows milk and he won.

This post was written after attending a hospital food challenge to cows milk. Harper is still allergic to egg, and tree nuts. He has now outgrown Potato, Peanut, FPIES to rolled oats, soy and cows milk.